Anxiety disorders have been diagnosed in 18 percent of the US adult population. And how many more of us live lives that are limited by fears of things that never happen? We spend a lifetime fearing or worrying about some eventuality that never arrives. And we frequently worry in wild disproportion to what might actually occur. The bottom line is that none of the fear - and the resulting anxiety, stress, distraction of it all - really does any good. It reduces our ability to be present in our lives, and leads to serious deterioration of our health and our immune system.
Are you living a life based on unwarranted fears? See if these statements sound like you:
o It's better to leave things as they are. This situation is not great, but something different could easily be worse.
o If I don't take care of this project myself, it just won't go well. No one cares as much as I do about it.
o People can't really know what's right for themselves. I am safer following the rules of authority (parents, church, peer groups, etc.)
o Stability is built from "tried and true" and "staying on the straight and narrow."
o Society would be chaotic if we didn't act from a sense of duty and obligation.
Though these statements don't sound all that abnormal, they do point to limiting beliefs about change, trust, control, guilt, and obligation (the five most prevalent fears). To begin the process of ridding yourself of these attitudes, try this four step process:
1) In what way does having this belief benefit my life?
2) In what way is having this belief a detriment to my life?
3) How would not having this belief benefit my life?
4) How would not having this belief be a detriment to my life?
Insights gained from this process can help uproot unwarranted fears. For example, through this process, some smokers have learned they were more interested in the occasional 10 minute break during work rather than an actual desire to have a cigarette. Taking a proactive approach by suggesting a fresh air break to the boss may prove a welcomed strategy for all involved.
Removing stress and fear from our lives improves our ability to think clearly, allows our immune system to operate properly, and leaves time and energy to move toward our optimal goals.
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