Regardless of your daughter’s age, in your eyes she will always be innocent and vulnerable. So when her date comes to the door to pick her up, it’s natural to feel protective. After all, you were just like that young chap once and, honestly, would you have let your daughter date you?
To put your mind at ease, we went to the experts; FBI agents who specialize in profiling individuals in order to predict behavior. If you screen your daughter’s dates as these agents suggest, you’ll be able to sleep easy even when she’s out past midnight.
Run a Background Check
Ask your daughter for the guy’s name beforehand, then search for him on websites such as MySpace, Facebook, and YouTube. Any personal profiles or videos that turn up will give you a sense of his personality. Look closely at his favorite movies, books and games. Criminals usually get their ideas in a movie.
Gauge his Dressing Judgment
Is he dressed appropriately for the date? His look should show thought and effort. This is important, because what a person wears reflects his overall level of judgment. Sports jacket, combed hair and cologne; good. Camouflage pants, unwashed hair and body odor; not so good.
Tats and Piercings
Generally, the more visible and in your face these are, the more they represent a cry for attention (or even help). Someone who is demanding ‘Look at me’ may have trouble being sensitive to another person’s needs. To be sure, ask about the meaning of his body art. It’ll provide insight into his character.
Let the Conversation Stop
See how he fills the pause. Beyond obvious red flag references to your daughter’s chest or his old man being in jail, look for a knack of making small talk. Gabbing about current events, sports or the weather, no matter how trite, shows that he’s polite.
Directly state what your Expectations are and what his Responsibilities are while he’s out with your Daughter
Watch his body language. If he folds his arms and moves away, however subtly, he’s resisting what you’re saying.
Check his car as they Drive Away
Is it appropriate for his station in life, or has he overextended himself financially for the sake of being noticed? This indicates the kinds of choices he makes, which may have an effect on the decisions he makes about your daughter. Even more critical, is the vehicle well maintained? If he’s taking care of the car, he’ll generally take care of your daughter. But just in case, jot down the license plate number.
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